Mountain Star

Most Ridiculous Thing I’ve Ever Bought

Alec Erickson, staff writer

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Ultimate Coaching Messiah Eddie Clark

“The dumbest thing I’ve ever bought was a lifetime subscription to MulletLovers Monthly Magazine. It also comes with a supply of hair gel and grease that the ladies can never seem to get enough of. It seemed like a good idea back in the day, but now that I’m settled down with my beautiful wife Kristi Clark, I no longer need the added appeal of the Tennessee top-hat. I keep my subscription mainly because I believe the Mullet will make a comeback within the next 3-5 years. In my professional opinion, if I hop on the bandwagon early enough, who knows? Maybe I can make some money off a mullet-driven business.”

 

Junior Class Elite Ethan Tomko

“The dumbest thing I’ve ever had the misfortune of buying was definitely my snowmobile. At first I thought buying a Skidoo would be a wise investment, but man was I wrong after she blew up on me after like the third ride of the season. It made me look like a real clown in front of my friends and family.”

 

Veteran Office Employee Margaret Hart

“The most ridiculous thing I’ve ever bought was probably my Instant Pot. Advertised as a 7-in-1 kitchen appliance  I thought, gee, how could this go wrong? But boy was I wrong… this pressure cooker turned out to be the equivalent of an Afghanistan IED road bomb. I said a prayer and took shelter behind my Country Livin’ cookbook. Though I can cook some mean Honey Garlic Chicken, my husband and I are afraid for our lives every night when we use the Pot.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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1 Comment

One Response to “Most Ridiculous Thing I’ve Ever Bought”

  1. Josh brandt on February 14th, 2018 3:01 pm

    The most ridiculous thing that I bought was a game that doesn’t make any sense

    [Reply]

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Most Ridiculous Thing I’ve Ever Bought